observations

Well, this is the third week back at work, and by third week I mean the fifth day, and by that I mean that I have just finished the 20th hour.  That's about all I can say about that.

I am very aware these days of life and lives around us moving on.  Our days pass but we remain in the same place.  I feel very disconnected from the real world.  That's just an observation, not a complaint.

The words don't come today for some reason, but I had to try. 

Another couple of observations:

• I can't deal with stress anymore
• I'm still angry, although not at my boy
• I will never have the opportunity to deal with a lot of my anger
• I like my grey hair
• I should not be working where I am working because I no longer believe in the system

I miss my son.  I can't describe the feeling..black, sharp-edged...ugly.

Time to go dig in the dirt.