Why do I blog? I'd only heard of blogs before and never read any.
I was journalling and one day I thought that maybe some experience that I was going through might help someone going through a similar experience. However, now I'm reading other blogs which are informative. I don't know that mine is...mine is more a public forum for my grief and that's not what I intended when I started. I feel safer going back to journalling. Sometimes people get hurt by reading sad things.
I wish I could always have a supply of happy things to say, uplifting things, helpful things. But I don't. Nor will I ever. I know I will never say "I am better". I will always say "I am okay".
So I am going to take a break for awhile from writing in this forum. I just can't do this right now.
I will continue reading the blogs I read as they give me strength but until I can do the same, the time isn't right.
Thank you for reading and sharing this much of my experience with me.
McCracken's Mom. xx
2 comments:
You are doing the very best that you can. Yes, it would be helpful if you had positive things, uplifting things, etc., but that isn't where you're at right now. And maybe you didn't start your blog with the intention of it being a public forum for your grief, but somehow maybe it took this direction, and maybe, just maybe, it was meant to be this way - you might be helping people. Maybe people who are going through similar experiences can relate to your raw emotional grief, and some may not be even able to say anything to you about their experiences, but they are getting a sense that someone is out there who knows what they are going through. You are able to put pen to paper (or keystroke to keyboard) and let it out this way...and maybe there is someone out there who needs to see it as they feel alone in their own grief. Do what you feel is best for you, but don't do things because you think you should or shouldn't...I, for one, believe your blog is here for a reason. I stumbled across it, and as sad as the circumstances are, it really is a beautiful blog. I wish you well, and I hope you continue putting your thoughts on paper, whether it be a blog, journal, whatever - your emotions come through in your writing. And remember - your life has changed so dramatically...it's okay to feel just "okay"...maybe in time things will change, but for now, you're okay. I wish you well!
Oh Andrea, I wish I could give you a big hug! If this doesn't feel right, then you should definitely stop. But you definitely DO inspire people to a deeper understanding with your blog. We gain a rare look at something so private, so raw, it can't help but change your reader.
I hope journaling is what will give you peace. And I hope to meet you in real life someday soon.
I'll be missing you,
Michelle
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